Forever Young

Today while eating my breakfast of toast and milk the song Forever Young by Jay-Z started playing on my i-pod and I was brought back to my freshman year of college.

I was at Utah State and it was my first week of being in college. So like most all kids I had my own worries of growing up and junk. There are some songs that when I hear them I am reminded of one memory or vivid time in my life. I'm pretty sure most people have those songs. One of those songs is Careless Whisper which I heard on my mission in Sao Paulo, Brasil. In that song the lyrics go "I'm never gonna dance again" and it hit me so hard cause that's 2 years without legit dancing, except for the occasional silent break dance fight with my companion, but besides that it's no dancing for 2 years. My heart pretty much cried when I heard that. Probably one of the biggest times I almost got sad. But that's another story. So anyways, my freshman year I was riding the bus to school and the song Forever Young by Alphaville came on over the radio. That moment was nuts. I remember thinking how I really do want to stay forever young cause more often than not old people bite. I know I have to grow old in age and numbers and crap like that, but I didn't want to actually get old in how I am and become a piece of trash and not have fun.

And that moment is a huge reason of why I am how I am today. Sitting on the bus hearing that song is one of the many experiences that have told me to stay young in how I act and feel. Of course staying young is not being a piece of trash and not working and being a waste of space, but in being young while working and having responsibility and everything too. I think I've done alright so far. I don't really wanna be with the old folks at the family outings and bbq's and stuff talking about boring junk while the kids are off playing ball and eating ice cream and stuff. I hope I'll be wrestling the other kids as long as my old brittle bones will allow me. My bones aren't brittle yet, but they'll be someday probably and then I can use that saying. This decision to try and enjoy life and stay young probably has not helped me in the past with some things cause that gets parents and other old people mad and while some of my friends spend time wooing the ladies I'm off pushing people into bushes and wrestling. That was pretty much my highschool experiences right there. Blake and Ben wooing the ladies, and Chad and Clark goofing around. That means less kisses sometimes, but I'll have eternity to be kissing the ladies, or at least one lady aka my wife, so I'm glad I enjoyed things like blowing stuff up, putting a big ol' fish on people's door step, the nights with LaFawnda R.I.P. (You might hear about her later), blowing more stuff up, wearing loin cloths, and the many other things we did. Anyways, I ramble and the point of the story is to stay young, forever young. That is one of those moments that everytime you hear that song you remember those feelings. I hope I can continue and apply the forever young doctrine while I grow up.

The day I almost cried

I haven't cried in a long time. The last time was 4-5 years ago when Sneakers, my beloved dog, died. I ask a moment of silence to all those who read this for Sneakers. She was everything a young Chad could ask for in a dog. In my dreams I see her running to me and her greeting me with all of her love like she has done so many times before when I make it to heaven. I hope that I make it to heaven for that reason alone. Sneakers is not the topic of today's writing though. I probably won't ever write much about her because there are no words that I could write that would give her the justice she deserves.

The reason of writing today is that I came very close to crying today. Actually the closest I've ever been to crying since that sad day. My eyes clouded over and were extremely misty, but because I was in the Merrill-Cazier Library at Utah State University, I didn't let a tear escape. I became very emotional though. I was browsing on Google Earth and looking at different places in Logan Canyon where I could go this summer on hikes and camping and I thought it would be cool to look at the place of my mission which was Sao Paulo, Brasil. It was a lot of fun looking at the different places I served. I came across my second to last area Pirituba. So, I went to find the house of my favorite person in the world. Fransisco. Also known as Peba. That man is the greatest. We would go to his house every day after lunch and I've never been happier than in his presence. He would play guitar for us and we'd talk for a long time. Then we'd teach him the gospel. It was great. He was great. And even though he was never baptized I still love him so much. Much more than I ever thought I could love an older man who smoked and was dirty in his ways. He was a trucker for the good part of his life and he was very much like a trucker. I could go on forever writing about him, so I'll stop it before I have a novel written. 

Anyways. I started thinking about this and I literally started misting up. To avoid the scene of a grown 22 year old man crying in the college library I stopped looking at where his house was set in the hills of the Marilac Favela. So instead I searched for a video of him singing and playing guitar for us and starting watching it. Bad idea for my misty eyes, but it turns out I have deep eyes that can soak up a lot of mist and that is what I did. I didn't shed a tear, but I came very close. Fransisco will be a man that I won't ever forget. I love him. Hopefully I can be with him again someday. Then in the eternities I may have Sneakers by my side while listening to Fransisco play his guitar for me. I'm almost tearing up again writing about this so I must stop before Logan, who is by my side watching TV, has reasons to tease me. Thank you Sneakers and thank you Fransisco. You two will forever be in my heart.

Fransisco

I love this